Simply Stupid: Kaiju Krumble?
by Cian-Nueral
Summary: Kaiju aren't what you think they are... they are regular citizens. The movie Kaiju however, they are actors and actresses!
1. A day in life of "Goji"...

**I have always liked kaiju, but what if they were MOVIE ACTORS? Summary:**

 **There is a certain family of Godzillasauruses that live in Odo Island, they recently traveled to Birth Island for their seasonal vacation**. **Our main character is Godzilla the Younger, the Godzilla that starred in millenium _Godzilla_ movies (1999-2004, AKA English era in this universe) and when he was a child actor in the _Heisei_ era(1993-1995). He's the famed son of Gojira ( _Showa_ , _Heisei_ , _Shin_ and all shorter Godzillas the Kiryus) and grandson of the _Monsterverse_ 's Godzilla** **the Elder**. **He's trying to get used to the fact that his filming sprees are random, the 'When's your next movie?' questions and the fact that a Divine Moth named Mothra Virgo hangs ot a little too much time with him. This much to Mothra Leo's (her cousin) displeasure**.

 **Note: Godzillasauruses age 4 times slower than humans.**

 **I dont own the big G nor his fellow kaiju, otherwise Toho would sue me.**

"Dad, can you stop carrying Minilla like a rag doll?" Godzilla the Second asked to his father, Giojira, as said kaiju lifted his very own grandson by the tail.

"But Daddy..." Minilla began, only to get shot down by his father.

"No Minilla."

This shot down Minilla, considering how there aren't any 50ft widescreen TVs yet in the seasonal home, they will arrive soon though, but not now.

"That is not a proper way to treat your son, son!"

"Grampa's right Dad!"

Godzilla then looked at the odds: If Minilla and his father were to continue messing around, then his grand father, Godzilla the Elder, popularily recognized as Old Man G, will wake up and roar out that they will ruin his beauty sleep. Considering and juggling between the two, he decided to leave the two to face the GreatGrandfather's wrath.

 **Outside and at a Cave...**

Mothra Virgo was just lying down in a dark cave. Despite being in Larvae form, she was hiding from what other Zodiac based Divine Moths experience: Being worshipped by the natives.

"Where is Lady Virgo?"

"I dunno where she is!"

The thing that she hated about being a larva is that she can only stay awake until 9 in the evening.

"Just a little long Virgo... You can't quit hiding-"

"Virgo." She heard a gruff voice that was extremely familiar.

"Is that you Goji?" She then asked, using Godzilla's popular nickname when he's on screen. Said kaiju then chuckled and glowed his scutes in a soft glow.

"Heh! Says the food and virginity 'diety'. It's like if I pray to you, you conjure a buffet the size of my grandfather!"

"Are you saying that I binge eat?!" The massive caterpillar then flared in anger and embarrassment...

 _Imaginary realm..._

 _Godzilla appears infront of an adult/ImagoVirgo as he chants out "Lady Mothra, I present to you this massive wheat, razz and blackberry treat the size of Ghidorah, please accept my offering and make a wedding feast appear for Biollante..."_

 _"Did you forget the strawberries and honey?"_

 _"Nope! They come in a bottle!"_

 _"Okay then!" The Moth then pulls out a bib from nowhere and takes a bite._

 _Back to reality..._

"Wh-What?! No! No." The dinosaur reassured.

"That would be disruptive to the cult's routine!"

"Sorry!" Godzilla then answered in a sheepish way.

"*sigh* It's okay." the moth caterpillar then softly answered, knowing that Godzilla is just as inexperienced as her when it came to conversations. Yet again...

"*VRRRRRRRROOOOOOOOOOOO!* Who woke me up from my beautiful slumber?!" Godzilla's grandfather, Old Man Godzilla, otherwise known as Godzilla's namesake, roared on the surface of the island.

"Heheheheh! Did you really have to leave your son with your father and wake up your grandfather?" Virgo then asked, sniggering from the wording Old Man G used when being woken up suddenly.

"Hey, I don't see anyone complaining. Maybe your family's cultists, but they will shrug it off."

"Ha! Touche!" was what he got in response in a friendly, but flirty manner... "You really know how to push my buttons... Did you know that I'm gonna go into my cocoon tonight Goji? I'll finally be in imago form!"

"Hey! That's great! Uh... I gotta go now. But Virgo?"

"Yeah Goji?"

"Can I get some giga-prunes?" He then inquired.

"Ooooo- *Zap!* Kay!" the larva then turned the largest boulders that can crush an elephant into large prunes the size of her head.

"Thanks!" a happy Godzilla then pats her on the head before walking out as Virgo then crawled to her temple...

 **Back at the Seasonal home...**

"Look what you made me do! Now I can't take a dump in the toilet without prunes!" Old Man G shouted as he sat on the massive toilet, waiting for his prunes inwhich Godzilla is still getting.

"Tou-san, you do know that Godzilla is still getting the prunes!" Gojira complained as he sat down in the living room, waiting for Godzilla.

"*Bang!* Sorry Gramps! I tripped over some rocks! but I got your prunes!" Godzilla shouted to his grandfather, passing the giga-prunes through the door, with Old Man G eating one.

"Ohhhhhh! *Pbbbbbbt!* That felt GO-*Pbbbbbbt!* OD! *Pbbbbbbt!*" The ancient dinosaur roared as he released his waste.

"Oh *blah!* Moths! Dad, why does Gramps do that?!" Godzilla then complained towards his father, who was staring in disgust also.

"Believe me son. This is for the best. You will find out why when you are a few centuries older." The grandfather muttered as he stared at the bathroom in hesitation, listening to the constant flushing of the toilet.

"I feel so- Oh... GET OUT OF ME!!! *Pbbbbbbbt!*" This was honestly one of the most scarring moments of Godzilla's life, hearing his insanely loud grandfather take a dump.

"Where's Minilla?"

"Playing with the locals." Gojira then muttered in pride. Socializing is one of the proper ways to make real friends, as Old Man G told him.

 **Chapter 1 end...**

 **Gozilla's life in this universe is pretty unusual, But this is the _Simply Stupid_ universe. EVERYONE has issues. Just so you know, this will be the first time I'll add an OC in the _Simply Stupid_ universe. Thanks for reading! Now go ahead and review!**


	2. MosurAW fudge nugget!

**Heh! Old Man G's got nasty potty issues.**

 **Anyways... Read, Review and Enjoy!**

When Mothra Virgo crawled out of her cocoon, she stumbled onto the stony walls that supported her cocoon... Despite being a full imago, she did not know how to use all of her legs yet. But who can blame her? Having your body and organs melted down and have a new body tends to mean that you do not entirely know how to operate the new limbs you have grown yet.

"Ow... That hurt!" That's because Virgo sprained one of her six limbs by rolling on the floor.

As the divine moth crawled out of her cave, light blinded her as she then saw that it was noon.

"*groan* What day is it? Monday- Sheesh! I sound like one of those normies from the United States!" Crawling off to one of the beaches she was so familiar with, she was searching for her cousin, Mothra Leo, on how to fly. "... Where are you? Leo? LEO? HELP A COUSIN, DANG IT!!!"

 **Meanwhile at the** **Gojirasaurus Magnus Household...**

"... You forgot my super-prune sprinkles! WHERE ARE MY SUPAH-PRUNES?!" Old Man G shouted out as Godzilla prepared some ice cream for all of the family. Old Man G has a vanilla and chocolate sundae, Gojira had some green tea mochi and Minilla thought that it would be nice to make a neopolitan tower (A tower of ice cream).

"Sorry! I forgot about that- Wait... Aren't they called gigaprunes?" The charcoal gray dinosaur asked as he then grabbed a dried prune and shredded it onto his grandfather's sundae.

"Bah! I forgot to remember what they were called! But I NEED MY S- *PBBBBBBBBBBBT!!!*" That was uncalled for Godzilla... But he's got something else to do. First order of buisness for him is to check if there were any threats around the island... A request he kept following after having a talk with one of Leo and Virgo's relatives, Mothra Cancer (The name speaks for itself), on the island's natural balance. The next will be if Virgo hatched from her cocoon yet.

"Anyways... I am going to check out the beaches again. I need some fresh air." All Gojira could do was snort in response as his son walked out to the beach.

"Fresh air, my scutes! I think he's looking for some pouty pollen-powdered moth on the island again!"

"What do you mean, Grampa?" Minilla asked out loud.

"Remember your Auntie Virgo?"

"Yes? The nice caterpillar-girl that Daddy hangs out with?"

"... I feel like she might become your step-mother someday."

"... That's not a bad thing... Right?

"No! No! I support it! Since I was married to a... Uh... Oh! Nevermind on how I met your grandmother! But if your Auntie Virgo becomes your stepmother, it would be official that this summer home would be our main home!"

"But we kept going to in Shinjuku, Odo Island and San Francisco so much!"

"... I know..."

"And the last time we went to the Philippines, it was for your great-grandfather's funeral! That was before your father found you, of course."

 **Out on Birth Island's beaches...**

"Leo?! Leo?! WHERE THE HECK ARE YOU?!" That was what Godzilla heard as he lumbered on the beach privately. He kept quiet, thinking that whoever was shouting was one of the natives in the area.

'I gotta be a little quieter... Or not move at all!' The actor thought to himself before shuffling his left foot _atleast_ the length of Tilikum the Killer Whale. "*kr-krack!* _Oof!"_ He accidentally crushed an abandoned jeep.

The leaves rustled a little bit before a fuzzy antenna poked out of the bushes and zapped him.

"*bzzt!*... _Ow!_ " Whoever owned the antenna must have heard him.

"ALRIGHT! TALONS UP IN THE- GOJI?!" A Divine Moth shouted out as she then crawled out of the bushes. The moth has white scales, blue compound eyes, blue wings with Godzilla's eye pattern, a stinger on her thorax and... ARE THOSE EYELIDS?! She's also the height of Old Man G's hips. It was Mothra Virgo... And she is confused as heck!

"Virgo?! I thought you were going to leave your cocoon later!"

"What day is it?!" The moth screamed out.

"Uh... Monday."

"... Mondays?"

"... Yup!"

"I HATE MONDAYS!" All Godzilla could do was hold in a giggle as he then carried Virgo to his big house.

"Okay Garfield!" The Dinosaur was then struck by lightning from above. "*z-zap!* ... Ow..."

 **Back to the 'house' once more...**

"Tou-san! What will Dagon-jiji think if he were to see you screaming at the top of your lungs in an inhabited island?" Gojira exclaimed as Old Man G was thrashing inside the kitchen, searching for something to eat.

"Bah! I don't kno-" Old Man G was then cut off by Godzilla, who was holding Virgo in a bridal position.

"*creak* Did I miss something?"

"Oh, you know, the usual. Your son and I awakening your great-grandfather with the billboard-sized Nintendo Wii-U once again." Gojira then sighed out in annoyance. "I see that one of the local moths is with you."

"Uh... Hi?" Virgo squeaked out before climbing onto Godzilla's tallest dorsal scutes, starring at Gojira nervously.

"Hello, Virgo! You look skinnier than your relatives! Almost like my son! It's like you two are _made_ for each other! haha!" Godzilla tried to defuse Gojira's joke.

"Dad, don't talk about my body structure like tha-" Godzilla was whinning in embarrassment now as Gojira talked about his body features resembling a little more like Old Man G's.

"Oh don't worry! Your snout is almost like your grandfather's!"

"*VROOOOO!!!* WHERE'S THE FOOOOOD?!" Old Man G roared out as he opened the fridge and grabbed a box of tempura.

"Ugh... _Nande warashi_ (Why me) _?_ *sigh* Virgo... Wanna vacay at Isla de Mara?"

"Sure!" Trying to creep as quietly as they could, Godzilla, with a silent Virgo riding on said Gojirasaur, waded across the wooden floor to head to another island. Before they left, Gojira shouted something out to the both of them.

"Son! The folks at Legendary are calling if you want to star in the movie series your grandfather appeared in!"

"Which one?"

"Monsterverse!"

"Oh! Tell them that I can!"

"I'll call them later- Tou-san! We have to warm these!" Gojira responded as he pulled the box of tempura out of Old Man G's mouth. "Where are the two of you going?"

"We're gonna be at Isla de Mara for a few days!"

"How long?"

"3 days?" Virgo bonked his head and whispered out that it should be 5 days. "*bonk!* _Ow!_ Oh... So 5? Okay! We will be away for 5 days! Take care of Minilla and Gramps!"

"Don't knock up that moth, you hear me?"

"I JUST BECAME AN ADULT, Mr. Magnus!!!" Virgo screeched out as Godzilla walked to the beach and began to dive. "Uh... I don't know how to swim!"

Seeing Virgo's wings encompass the both of them, Godzilla had no choice but to grab Virgo.

"*slowly gets picked up...* Uh... Goji?! What are you doing?!" Godzilla chuckled as he positioned her into the shape of Mothra Libra's eggs.

"I'll teach you how to fly! Spread your wings when you are a couple hundred feet in the air! I'll catch you before you land!" Virgo still contemplated the entire time.

"Wait... Wha- *gets thrown like an NFL football...* AHHHHHHHHH!!!" Virgo was thrown into the sky as if a space shuttle was carrying her.

 **Chapter 2 end...**

 **References:**

 **1\. 'Normies'**

 **2\. I made up an ice cream-cake hybrid called a Neoplitan tower... Just stack chocolate, vanilla and strawberry ice cream on top of cookie-batter cake and waffle cones**

 **3\. Mothra Virgo's design is the _G:KOTM_ design**

 **4\. Godzilla is looking closer and closer to Old Man G's design... But he is still skinnier, darker scales and his scutes still have a white tint**

 **5\. Legendary studios' Monsterverse franchise**

 **6\. NFL**

 **7\. NASA's defunct Space Shuttle program**

 **8\. Godzilla and Mothra Virgo might visit Rodan!**

 **That's all, folks!**


End file.
